my life in memes

guess who found a roach in her shoe

It was me, you didn’t see this coming.

My cat had been sniffing my shoes, like he does, but after ten minutes I thought it was getting a little excessive. Then I saw him jump and swat at it like it was alive. Or like something was alive inside it.

So I take a step over there.

“I think there’s a roach in my shoe.”

“No, there’s not.”

“Shake it,” I said.

Sure enough, when Chris shakes it the little bugger does a lap around the shoe like he’s on the last lap of fucking Nascar and dives back in. This was followed by the most not so surprised sounding and yet still obligatory  ”Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh” I’ve ever uttered. Because there was a goddamn roach in my shoe.

And now my cat is watching over the pair vigilantly, like he’s expecting an army.

if dragon naturally speaking didn’t suck balls imagine how much writing I’d get done

Uploaded the last photos I took in Japan to facebook. Until we meet again.

spacelovemelody:

current emotion: i need money

mushy feels and gross sobbing

I’ve been home for almost a month and I still find myself wishing my friends from my JLSP group were around. Like, “Oh if so-and-so was here they’d love that.”

I seriously think I’m going to love and respect you guys for the rest of my life.

ronystart:

do you ever see the person you have a crush on do something really fucking ridiculous and you just watch and think “ah yes this is where i have laid my affections”

cecefredzilla:

snaketeen:

there’s a thin line between word and world

get out

I had a dream that I got trapped in a mobile home with some crazy guy who was driving it on a narrow roller coaster road/track up a mountain and freaking out screaming we were all gonna die and then it stopped as we flew off the road and there was a talking bunny the size of a capybara and he was cool we chatted until he fell asleep and then some rednecks tried to resurrect some people from the civil war like it was imperative and ended up bringing the anti-christ and the forces of heaven against one another and it was the apocalypse.

bon-bon:

The older I get the more I realise there are no grown ups and nobody knows what the fuck they’re doing.